My favorite shot in Dreams on Spec, a documentary on screenwriting, is where one of the writers trying to breakthrough is eating out with his wife and child. He tries to tell his wife (who works full-time and has the insurance for the family) about trying to get actress Terri Hatcher to read his script. But his wife’s eyes are vacant and she appears uninterested probably from years (decades?) of hearing about his dreams deferred.
It’s a subtle moment and easy to miss. But the moment is not lost on the director and/or editor as they follow that moment with this quote by writer and therapist Dennis Palumbo;
“A writer’s life and a writer’s struggle can be really hard on relationships, very hard for your mate to understand. Your ups and downs, the fact that you’re spending all of these hours doing something that doesn’t seem to have a tangible reward. Not to mention the financial strain. Because for most writers they have to take day jobs that don’t bring them the kind of money and security that their mate would want, particularly if children start coming into the equation.”
When I was in film school in L.A. I worked for a short time at Frank’s Camera in Highland Park. I sold a camera one day to a fellow who worked in film production and I asked him if he had any advice and he looked at me dead in the eyes and said, “Don’t get married.”
It doesn’t take long to realize that 16 hour days (sometimes away from home), or days (or weeks, or months) without work is not usually conducive to a normal, healthy marriage. If you’re just starting out on your creative journey it’s best to be honest with yourself and your mate if you chose them to go on the journey with you (whether on the production side or the writing side), and you need to realize that if you go down this road it’s like joining the circus. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that, of course. But not everyone likes the freak show.)
(Nov. 5 insert: As an example here is a note in my diary from 2007 that I just came across while cleaning up. “Yesterday I flew after a shoot in Charlotte to New York to Minneapolis to Waterloo, Iowa arriving home just before midnight. I repacked my things and went to sleep around 2AM, woke up at 5:30 AM to catch a 7AM flight out of Waterloo to head to San Francisco for a shoot.” Not a typical 24-hour period, but not a totally unique experience. )
Over the years I’ve been able to make one keen observation from at least the perspective of my male friends who have pursued careers as musicians, artists, photographers, writers or filmmakers, and that is the number one occupation for their spouses to have is in nursing. (Second is physical therapist which is really in the same camp.) I’ve given it a little thought and I think the reason is that nurses tend to like what they do, make good money, work irregular schedules and tend to be nurturing individuals.
Just making an observation. They tend not to teach those things in school.
By the way, I see where Frank from Frank’s Camera is still alive though his building just outside downtown L.A. is for sale for $5 million. Man, I should have stuck with camera sales.
[...] My favorite shot in Dreams on Spec, a documentary on screenwriting, is where one of the writers trying to breakthrough is eating out with his wife and child. He tries to tell his wife (who works full time and has the insurance for the family) about trying to get actress Terri Hatcher to read his script. [...] Original Source… [...]